I’m a parent for real!

Soooo, this past weekend was an eye opener of sorts or me. I had a couple “oh-my-gosh-I’m-a-mom” moments. First, on Friday my youngest son had an art show to attend. It was really neat, actually. The teacher had it set up like a real art gallery showing with art work displayed, music from the school jazz band, and even snacks! I was very proud standing next to my baby. His Dad and I talked about how weird it was to have teenage children when we are just barely 30 (I’m still 29 for a few more weeks). As his father and I visit my eldest son comes and taps me on my shoulder. I turn around and there he is with this beautiful young lady by his side. He introduces me to her and I am sure the look on my face was priceless. It went from who is this chick? To oh, her! I finally get to meet her. This girl has been a good friend of his for a few years now, but he wants to date her. He is stuck in the friend zone, poor guy. So I start asking her general questions like if she had art work in the show and she was so polite and kept calling me ma’am. My youngest son’s father started to crack a smile and pointed out the ma’am reference. I told her she really didn’t need to call me ma’am. So she replied, “ok, ma’am.” Really?!?! So there I was in the middle of an 8th grade art show having my “oh-my-gosh-I’m-a-mom” moment, ex laughing at me, oldest son wanting to run from me, and (thankfully) the youngest son talking to folks about his art work. I am pretty sure the room started to spin but I am not sure I remember the rest of the evening.

Then came Sunday……

Sundays will never be the same for me……. EVER!

On Sunday my youngest son calls to start coordinating his returning home from his Dad’s. He isn’t good at being the middle man on phone conversations so he hands the phone to his Dad. We iron the details and I am about to hang up when he tells me he has something else he wanted to “just let me know.” My ex and I get along fine so I was sure it wasn’t anything we would argue about so I tell him to go ahead. He informs me that he had busted my baby with porn. SAY WHAT? He explains the whole story to me and I don’t say anything. He repeats it again, two more times, and all I can say is, “ok, got it.” I hang up the phone and look at my husband and oldest son for a second and then return to trying to teach myself to knit. They both ask what is up and I just tell them I’ll tell ya later. When I get to the meeting point to switch off my son, his father apologized profusely for just rambling on. I tell him no need, I was just in shock and couldn’t form a sentence. I am sure I didn’t do a good job of explaining myself, nor am I doing the story justice on here, but I am still in shock. I mean I knew it was coming, but a parent is never really ready. On the way home my son and I talked about it. He says it is easier to talk to me about this stuff, which made me feel good. He says I have a way of making an embarrassing situation laughable. Score one for Mom! I tried to give him some advice on the situation, as best I could. We will see how it goes.

On a side note, I seemed to have picked up knitting at the right time. I associate knitting with older folks and originally thought I would look ridiculous knitting. I don’t think that anymore, or maybe I have come to terms with getting older? Heck I don’t know. All I do know is that my kids are growing up and I should start acting like an old lady with grown up kids.

 

Augh! Never did I think I would have things like this happen to me when I am only 29!!!! Can I go back to my 21st birthday and just hit the repeat button? Please, I promise I’ll be a good girl.

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Teenagers…. oh my!

So I have two teenage boys who I am sure are becoming less mature each day. So last night I chose to leave the boys at home so I can visit a friend. I thought this would be an easy event, but I was wrong. When the boys and I got home I instructed them on what needed to be done. I didn’t need them to do much in the way of chores but I did need them to pack everything for our quick trip this weekend. I stayed until the chores were done, since I figured this particular item on their to-do list would most likely not get done. Once I was satisfied with the vacuuming and sweeping they had done I grabbed my things and headed for the door. I reminded my oldest that his laundry had to be finished so he would have clean clothes to take on the trip. I let him know that my clothes weren’t quite finished in the dryer and to please leave them in the near by basket when he moved  his over. The last thing I said before I shut the door was that they needed to eat in an hour, which would be right around 6 pm.

Then I high tailed it! I wanted just a couple of hours of kid free adult time. The last little bit I could get before we head out today. I love my boys but they have really been working my nerves lately. I thought I would do us all a favor and get some separation before we to spend the next 71 or so hours together.

I am here to tell you that they must have really enjoyed my idea and used the free time to do absolutely nothing. I had to call my diabetic son around 6:45 pm, to make sure he had eaten and to find out how his blood sugars were doing. He hadn’t even thought about eating. I instructed him to immediately feed himself and let me know what his blood sugar was before he ate. I left the conversation at that since I could already tell I would not be a happy person when I returned home. If the boy could be bothered to feed himself, then him and his step-brother must be occupied with doing something they aren’t supposed to be doing, like watching TV. You see, both my boys thought it would be a great idea to bring home progress reports with C’s and D’s. How did they get those C’s and D’s you ask? Simple, they just didn’t feel the need to turn in some of their assignments. Zeros are never tolerated in our house. C’s and D’s are only acceptable if they are having a hard time in a particular subject, but only after going to tutorials and studying. None of those applied to either child for this particular progress report.

When I returned home I found that my oldest hadn’t moved any clothes around in the washer and dryer, my youngest hadn’t packed his bag with the clothes I had already approved earlier, and I could tell the TV had been recently on. I let them know that I was completely disappointed with them for doing NOTHING while I was gone and that they will continue to be under 24/7 adult supervision for the rest of their lives.

The trip is today and I am dreading it. I do not understand why I have to hold the hand of a 13 and 15 year old in order to get them to do what they are told. At this rate I am afraid they will never be able to move out of my house when they become adults. It will not be from my lack of instruction, but from their complete laziness.

I know I can not be the only one with brain-dead teenage boys…… am I?  Anyone…….anyone…